There are so many reasons why keeping your ceremony intimate is a great idea. The elope now, party later approach is especially popular around big cities like New York. I’ve worked with couples who have been legally married for a few years, as well as couples who are in the process of planning an elopement but already know they want a celebration afterwards. When talking to couples, I’ve found that planning a post-elopement party feels more confusing than a “standard” wedding. I’m here to break down the ins and outs of planning your celebration after you’ve eloped.

There is No Right Time

While traditional wedding ceremony and receptions happen the same day, you do not have to follow the same protocol for a post-elopement celebration. You need to assess your life situation and decide when it’s best for you. That could mean waiting a year or two to save more money or finish getting your degree. For others, you might want your ceremony to be in a location that doesn’t accommodate a large group, or you simply feel more comfortable if only your S.O. hears your vows. In your case, perhaps a same-day or weekend celebration makes sense.

Think About Your Announcement

Is this the first time people are hearing about your marriage or are they already aware? One of the most commonly asked questions is how to word your post-elopement invitations. Here are some ideas:

If you want to send invitation before you elope

• “We are tying the knot in (insert place here) on (insert date here)! Please be our guest at a party to celebrate our marriage when we return”

If you’re having your celebration soon after your elopement

• “Surprise! We eloped. Join us to celebrate our marriage”

• “We became The (insert last name here). Let’s celebrate”

If you’ve been married for a while

• “Please join us as we renew our wedding vows and celebrate our lives together”

• “You’re invited to a night of merriment to celebrate our love”

Choose Your Party Style

Because you’ve decided to forgo the traditional wedding, your options for the type of celebration become endless. Maybe you’re excited about a backyard crawfish boil where everyone wears casual clothing. Or on the flip side, you want to get decked to the nines and have a lavish intimate dinner party. Because there are less expectations from guests, the two of you can get super creative.

Skip the Stuff You Don’t Care About

While I give all clients this advice, this rings even more true for a post-elopement celebration. Not into dancing? Don’t pay for a DJ! Can’t stand the idea of formal pictures? No problem—opt for a private portrait session before the party starts and then go for all candids.

You Can Still Have a Ceremony

By now you’re probably getting the hint that there truly is no right way to hold your post-elopement celebration. That means you can still have a ceremony if you want! You can ask special people to recite poems, incorporate family traditions that may have gotten left out the first time around or read a joint marriage statement to your guests.

You Can Still Make a Registry

If you’re throwing a party to celebrate your marriage, you can absolutely still put together a registry. While some people may not give a gift, there are plenty who will want to. The size of your guest list should determine how you communicate the information. If it’s really small, a wedding website isn’t necessary. You can send your registry link via email, or include in an information card when sending your invitations. For medium-large groups, it’s helpful to put it on your website as well.

Be mindful of the items you’re putting on your registry. For smaller celebrations, limit the number of options. You don’t want to overwhelm people and you’re more likely to get the things you really want if it’s ultra curated.

Hire a Planner

Yes, I am totally biased here but while a post-elopement reception is less stressful than a typical wedding, it’s still a production. Lots of people put off the celebration piece for a while because they don’t know where to start and feel lost from the start. Hire a wedding planner to help guide you in making your post-elopement celebration an event to cherish and remember forever.